Rayson Electra's Life.

2009-09-10T01:45:00.000-07:00

Life seems to be always playing around.
everything seems so peaceful for that one second and the next , everything seems so wrong.
human love laughters of people.
isn't that ironic , laugh yourself then , its not the same
like what Life means.
Life causes people to have different way of perspective towards it.
But its for one to choose , just like choosing coffee in starbucks.
If you're happy you tell self that everything is going well.
Life causes human to change , in terms of everything and anything.
Always seeking the stimulus to cause yourself to change for the better.
this can never happened to some.
This surreailty seems so perfect , but its not and it will never be.
everything is just a picture , it seems to ace.
some times when you are alone in life , thoughts flood your mind.
if you're clever you use that to reflect upon yourself or be imaginative.
but others choose to dwell on the solemn and sad presence.
give me the choice , would i choose to be here?
my answer , without any hestitation , would be yes.
life might be like tidal waves , pulling people back away.
but it really voice down to how you look at it.
changing your grave into a stepping stone , its about determination.
life is about what you want , what you feel , you don't have to follow the crowd to be secure.
some people say that im abnormal , im not.
im just being myself , i talk what i want without holding back.
some love to beat around the bush , let me say that life will play it back to you.
whats the point? , life isn't that complicated as you think it is.
human stress themself as they think their stress.
but my dear friends , like what i say.
Life isn't as complicated as you think it is.
trust me , or its up to you.
you choose.

2009-09-03T01:37:00.000-07:00

singapore idols never worked well ,
i think its more of discouraging some of those talented people.
take a look for Nurul Huda and Janah , i'm sure their much better than farhan , like what ken said.
so after all singaporeans are dying to have a idol as their friend.
well felt kinda pity for Nurul Huda and Janah , Nurul Huda has the best voice in all the season so far.

Alright people , went to school today.
same usual stuff , school is getting bored.
Can't wait to get out of it.
Well , i think im most probably gonna work , travelling overseas with liz and cheryl
during november so gotta work.
moolah come rolling in please.
alright.
tomorrow going for a swim with liz , cheryl and louise at laguna.

alright people im too tired to blog.

2009-09-01T06:17:00.001-07:00

remember the day that you will alone.
feeling so timid about everything while all the possible outcomes
flood your tiny winy mind.
standing alone , in front of the vast ocean.
the smell of the sea breeze that lingers around your nose just slow your mind down.
everything starts to tear down infront of you as the rain pour.
the dark gloomy clouds , the deep blue ocean and the cold atmosphere.
trying to calm yourself down in this hetic world.
as soon as your heart sank and everything starts to slow down , tears started to stain your cheeks.
you find all the possible reason to ask yourself why is this thing happening to you , while blaming everything that cause this to happen including yourself.
feeling sick and tired of life , thoughts of drowning yourself appear.
but yet something is holding you back.
a feeling so strong that can cause you to hold back despite of all this hectic problems.
suddenly you felt that you have found the answer to everything.
everything starts to stop for a moment.

the answer for me is ignorance , how about you people?

2009-08-28T05:14:00.000-07:00

Its the second day of hell lot of drama from you.
The hinting and stuff.
You dont blame people for being the way they are , rather you should get blame for being effing sensitive.
Well , you do things to get accept? , more of like trying too hard to fit in some times.
I wonder why you're always telling lies and proclaim that others does that too.
White lies = paper. A piece of white paper will never be able to cover over a fluming red flames.
Not everyone except white lies.
Like i said it is easy to tear you down , we are not trying to be mean first you started the ball rolling.
its always because of your lies.
maybe you might think its white lies , so? its still lie.
you love to delete evidence.
you treat friends as come and go , vice versa for you. friends come and go for you too.
nothing is as important as your lust , let me repeat it , L-U-S-T.

to;wonder of wonders.

Xoxo, RaysonElectra.

2009-08-27T04:07:00.000-07:00

its ironic , always acting strong but still weak on the inside and you're showing everything out.
its not like what you presume , it never was,
wonder of wonders you are if you were to be label.
but not to the extend that you will catch all eyes on you , thats the moxie for you to turn out this pathetic way.
like what dog does , it always return to its vomit after throwing up , its the same for you.
nobody will pity you if this is what you choose.
you are not as cunning as you think , you never can be.
you stab me in the back twice and i think i never can trust you anymore.
yes you can be blur at times , thats all an act.
your acting skills wont pass my eagle eyes.
you''re a sandcastle not a bridge , as the waves comes , you'd be all gone.
its easy to tear you down.
its seriously easy , like a 20 year old singing the alphabet song.
i never thought that you would be like a ...?
well you''re not in the group of whore , sluts and bitch.
congrats to you , you're damn unqiue like you always want to be.
you came out with something new like ?
i guess its not worth for you to have such a creative person to help think a name for you , like me.

xoxo, RaysonElectra.

2009-08-25T04:42:00.000-07:00

Being somebody famous isn't everything.
I wonder why some of the people i know just want to be famous.
I mean if you want to be famous , let it be natural.
You don't have to come out with a fake self to be famous.
Its really annoying to see you like this.
Being unique means being yourself , its not like what you think , Trying to act as somebody who is unique to be unique.
Well , maybe i shouldn't care much.

Skipped school today , was feeling damn lethargic.
Well , scored 60 for my english overall , got first in class again. :)
I flunk most of my papers.
I guess not flunk , just that i never study for my prelims , even though n lvls are just less than two weeks away
im still not studying. geez.
some people might ask me why most of the time im positive , it is because being positive is a excuse for me to
procrastinate.
hahaa. :3
well , hope that i would be able to do well for my n lvls, its the break it or make it season.
FML.
well discussed with my parents about the after life of my n lvls.
was wondering if i should proceed to secondary 5 , or ite?
but well i want to put studying to a stop for me. i rather do things that can help me get skills.
so i decided to go for fashion design in lasalle or shatec for kitchen culinary skills.
but i dont really know any details and requirements etc.
geez , life is just like a never ending cycle , always doing things repeatedly.
if only i got the moxie to request for oversea studies.
new society and new environment.
wouldn't that be nice , its just like tearing the old page of your diary and starting to scribble over a new page.
hoping that all the past mistakes that you've done could be forgotten by people.
alright people , im heading out for dinner with my sister.
see ya. :)

2009-08-15T14:18:00.000-07:00

THE BUTTERFLY , FLY AWAY.

One more minute to 5.20.a.m

Have been tossing around in my bed since 1.

Decided to wake up at around 2-3+

Caught silent hill on channel 5 , its a nice show.

The reason why im still blogging now is because

im having a really bad sore throat the worst so far in my 16 years of life

plus,

my gums are swelling.

i guess i ate too much heaty food , esp chilli sauce.

my legs are having pulling tension that really cause great pain

to me.

afterall i feel shitty today , as in really shitty.

feeling damn sicked , and im sick of this feeling.

geez , i lost my maths notes i wonder how am i going to study ltr.

somemore i will surely fall asleep ltr on.

no point going to friend house to study? , no idea.

but if by monday the illness is not going away i doubt i will be going to school

even though there is exams , anyway its just prelim.

my throat is really aching like a bitch.

you can taste blood in every slip of saliva sallowed.

annoying la , and everytime i have sore throat and stuff that gotta to make me feel uncomfortable in my mouth i always have the tendency to remove my tongue stud.

geez.

my dad was blaming me , he say because i always reach home late and always been out instead of staying at home , thats why im sick -.-'

say i everytime sleep very late , i think that i sleep the earliest in my family la.

having a really bad mood due to my fucking throat its really annoying and irritating.

fuck.

2009-07-16T02:19:00.000-07:00

LIFE CAN BE SCRUTINIZING.

currently in school with liz , louise and cherry.

but liz left , wonder who is she meeting! :3 hehehe.

okay just done with my prepwork headings. :3

it was a fruitful afternoon!

alright , people i doubt i have anything more to blog. :D

2009-07-14T05:04:00.000-07:00

CROSSOVER.

yea thats marie digby people. :3

it was at gap , wisma.

not sure how long ago it was.

Today was surely a day , im so tired thanks to the study programme

went to have sushi for lunch with cliques.

So school start from 7.30 all the way till 4.30 with short breaks during that long hours.

School was as usual today , anyway this was my first time getting so high for my maths

even though it was just a test i'm really happy with it.

i scored 13 out of 15! :D

have to save up for the up coming chalet on the 25th.

:D , so i guess im skipping my breakfast and lunch all the way till 25th.

I've skipped P.E. lessons for more than one year!

haha :) , just so lazy.

but the reason that im really not participating its because i lost my P.E. pants. D:

yea and it's the last year for me , so i doubt i will be buying it.

Don't think i'm able to get into secondary five , even though if i could i would rather choose higher nitec.

School every weekdays is really wearing me out , dead on one's feet.

how i hope that singapore education system can really slow down , at least let the student rest la.

can you imagine like 7.30 to 4.30.

aw oh.

Can't wait for the day to get out of springfield.

so going to get my crazy hairstyle , something that is out of the norm.

something that is sui generis.

Sometimes i really ponder on this topic , Emptiness.

I as a person , always feel empty.

what do i mean by empty?

okay here are some of the questions i want you to asked yourself.

why are you created in this earth?

what is your destiny?

what really makes you happy?

what is the real you? as in emotion wise.

by nature are you happy as a person?

what have you really achieve so far?

the question is not going to stop.

this are the question that usually flood my mind.

for years and i can't really answer them , at least some but not really wanted the outcome to be.

i guess some would stay empty forever.

not knowing what is their real purpose for being created.

well as time pass i guess everything will wear off , this thinking of mine.

its kind of silly.

you can find things to express yourself when it comes to emotion that are common , like happy , anger , sadness and disappointments.

what about emptiness?

i asked myself with a smirk on my face.

i guess nobody would be able to answer this , even i myself couldn't.

how are you going to express emptiness?

just by telling?

its not enough people.

2009-07-13T03:28:00.001-07:00

Lets just start everything over. seriously.
im kinda sick of it.

2009-07-08T04:01:00.000-07:00

AJAR IS MY HEART.

just woke up!

super tired!

was revising my work right after shower upon reaching home.

studied chemistry and maths <3

finally im not that lazy when it come to homework! :D

but im getting lazier when it comes to food , i rather not eat anything if you were to ask me to buy food myself.

but anyway my mum and dad is currently at my grannie place so

my second brother , sister and i went to the NTUC.

purchase frozen food like fries and fish nuggest , maggi noodles and corn flakes.

<3>

alright , school tomorrow! staying back for art.

somewhat compeleting my canvas but not my prep work.

saturday might be going over to clarke quay , liang court , jaslin's have this free 4 hour at party world<3.

but nickho wants me to go church with him. D:

geez how how people?!

CHALET on 25! <3

wooo. :3

no adults will be there i guess , time for vodka <3.

bbq and lets all get wasted !

I've been thinking about this , People say that if you were drunk all the things you said are just rubbish but form my point of view , i think its more of your real inner expression.

the things that you wanted to say but couldn't due to some situation.

getting drunk is a art for me somehow , i think this sound stupid but its true.

think about it.

2009-07-07T06:54:00.000-07:00

EDGE OF FALLING.

this picture was taken last saturday.
during the trip to clarke quay , our clique usual slacking place.
:3
So last friday we were actually supposed to accompany SerenaLiz , to get her navel pierced.
But we ended up not going on friday , cause due to the timing and stuff like that , so i ended up accompanying nickho down to east coast , actually.
but we somehow ended up in tampines macdonalds.
haha.
so chilled out with nickho and ruyi till around 6.
headed back home.
Bathe and packed my bag upon reaching home.
Left house at around 7.15pm.
headed to SerenaLiz's house for sleepover with Cheryl.
Haha , jovin , cheryl and liz was swimming , actually i wanted to join them but i guess its too late.
i reached around 8+pm.
haha , so we headed back to liz apartment and ordered pizzahut for dinner <3.
Jammed with guitarhero at her house and after that had some talk/discussion and went to sleep.
so the next day , we woke up at around 1+ to 2.
Yea , late i know.
So bathed at her house , had lunch and headed out to clarke quay! :3

Headed to fareast.
now i know where that STAGE shop is , i think that its kind of stupid cause i heard from louise
that one jacket cost around $100 - $200.
i mean is the jacket really that nice meh?
damn , good bucks if you were a star and own-ing your fashionlabel.

So yesterday met up with liz , cheryl and louise for dinner<3.
after dinner , louise and liz left.
cheryl and me were slacking around the community center :3
talking about our future ambition?
HAHA.
like damn fun.

Today was N'lvl english oral.
It wasn't that hard i guess?
Cause i think i did well for reading aloud , not really picture teacher prom' me 2 times during that and 1 time during conversation.
My time taken for oral was damn fast , i wonder if i did well cause i really did it damn fast as in it wasn't long when its my turn.
Jovin took the longest among the clique , so i was thinking if its better if its longer?
im not sure.
but i hope that i won't flunk my oral , its 20% for godsake.
that can make a huge difference and i mean HUGE , like real huge.

I completed my maths homework in 25 minutes! (Y)
adding one extra question , my maths teacher only requested us to do Question 1 - 4.
but i went to do 5.
haha :D
kinda worried for my maths , as N'lvls are really around the corner.
No second chances given , no child play.
So gotta be really serious.
Revised my chemistry and physics today! (Y)
So today was a really fruitful day for me , first time doing my homework and revising?
Haha. :3
feel accomplished! (Y)
damn happy.
Oh ya , sometimes i wonder if studies are really important.
cause now lots of uni grads' are still not able to find a job.
imagine , yes we can pass and get into poly , what about uni?
would the company hire the uni grads' or a poly grads'?
and theres still alot of uni grads' that are jobless does that means the poly grad's
dont stand any chance in our society now adays?
well , maybe talent and hobby will come to play , but people will say after all its singapore , so what you wanna become a singer in singapore? do you think you will be famous?
im not trying to say that singapore don't have famous singers , but out of that bunch of local singers , how many really did get famous?
Well , i guess we just have to take one step by a time.
Oh ya and i seriously hate the new criteria for the N'lvls this year.
we are the first batch to get this criteria , So its like EMB3 below 19.
sounds hard.
I guess if i were to work really hard i would be able to pass my EMB3 , so im able to get 5 subject passed.
but how about getting 19 marks and below?
i guess its not that easy.
People who can do maths in my class cannot do really well in english.
Vice-versa for those who can do well for english.
Well , people i guess im needa tug-into bed soon.
Theres school tomorrow.
Seeya people.

2009-07-06T00:55:00.000-07:00

YOU'RE DELUSIONAL.

hey people!

its been ages since i blog and i mean ages.

yea so now coming back with new blogskin and music<3.

mariah carey - Obsessed.

newest song from her , which is not even out in iTunes yet.

This blogskin took me only 2 hours.

wow , kinda shock and impress with the speed.

Was out for the last fewdays!

qiuyan's house for sleepover (Y) with cheryl!

the next day to cityhall , qiuyan getting her navel piercing , damn sexy.

@ primitive , 55 bucks.

woo , can't wait to get my collarbone / eyebrow piercing or anti eyebrown by the end of this year.

tattoo too!

was thinking if i should get the simpsons donut , the pink donut.

Its school tmrw , and its been rainning since ytd.

So damn cold , freezing badly these few days during sleep.

can't really sleep well , shivering non-stop.

alright people i gotta go and prepare already <3

meeting cheryl , qiuyan and louise later for sushi<3>